I hated dating, which is why I got married. ( okay, I was also in love). But I remember dating as being so time consuming. You have to find a guy. You have to get him to ask you out. You have to find something to wear on the date. You have to find something else to wear on the date. You go on the date- have to be witty. You have to wait for his call. While waiting for his call, you have phone conversations with your friends about how long one should wait for his call. Etc..etc.. So, I had a chat with Kathi O’Neil, the publisher of the hip guide Portland Picks and the now defunct dating magazine, Potion TV about the world of dating, fashion, and her love of Target.
Basics
What is your full name
Kathi O’Neil
How old are you (or how old do you feel)
I’m 38 but feel 24 most days.
Occupation
Publisher of the now defunct Potion TV Magazine, publisher of Portland
Picks, and Owner/President of Westover Media.
Current Home
After many years in San Francisco and Manhattan, I moved back home to Portland
and was fortunately able to sustain my big city career in a smaller market.
Celebrity Fashion Twin (the one celebrity your own sense of style is
most like)
Oh, gosh.. I wouldn’t call any of them my twin, but maybe my fashion idols….Audrey
Hepburn, Grace Kelly, and the late Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. They are timeless.
Dating Advice
As the publisher of the former hip dating site, Potion.TV you have
a Gucci bag full of dating advice. What are five things you should never do
on a date?
If it’s a first date..
#1 – DO NOT SLEEP WITH HIM, under any circumstances.
#2 – Do not get drunk (which will help avoid #1 as well).
#3 – do not talk about marriage or babies.
#4 – Do not talk about old boyfriends
#5 – Do not be negative or whiny.
Pretty obvious stuff.
What are the five things you should never wear on a date?
#1- Too much perfume
#2- Too much makeup,
#3- Clothes that are too small or don’t fit properly, e.g. hip huggers and crop
tops (no tummy on a first date, even if you have the six-pack for it)
#4- Fake nails or nails that are too long (absolutely no nail art!).
#5- Also don’t be too designer-clad (e.g. the Burberry jacket, Burberry purse,
scarf, etc). It’s a big turn off and sends the wrong message. (Obviously, there’s
the theme here, moderation is key with everything in life, down to the way you
smell.)
I have a date. I have 1 hour and $50 bucks to find something to wear.
What should I do?
No worries! Great last minute fashion buys don’t always come with a hefty price
tag. I always trust my old mainstay Banana Republic- classy, yet flirty and
fun. A floral strapless cotton dress or a flouncy skirt with a camisole you
already own would be perfect datewear this season- either outfit can be dressed
up or down depending on your own inspired shoe and jewelry choices.
My mom is a recent widow and now she is starting to get back into the
dating scene after a 35 year hiatus. What are some tips for women who are just
getting back into the whole dating scene?
Ugh! I shudder at the thought of my mom posting on Lavalife or some other online
swingles hangout. Getting back into the dating scene is tough at any age, but
especially anxiety provoking when you lose a spouse. I think the best way to
meet someone with whom you share interests with is to join a health club, country
club, or garden club. Even better, take up golf—- the perfect way to meet
some handsome men her age (or even younger!). If none of these float her boat
maybe a cooking class or learning a second language will…there are so many
opportunities out there for women of every age to meet like-minded mates. Most
importantly, it’s crucial that she use the same friends she leaned on after
being widowed and get the 411 out that she’s back in the dating game!
When I was a single gal, my friends and I use to cruise online dating
services like Match.com and Yahoo.com. We found that online dating was good
for casual dating, but not for serious relationships. Do you agree with our
observation or are we just losers?
I’m with you! We all want to meet Mr. Right, but wading through the weirdos
and casual dating matches is exhausting. The best way I’ve found to meet that
special someone is through referrals from friends and people whom you trust.
I adore the concept Great Boyfriends/Great
Girlfriends has come up with. Each dating "candidate"
comes with a stamp of approval, whether it’s from an ex, friend or family member.
Dating is hard enough, it’s always nice to know that someone else would actually
recommend a guy for a dating relationship!
Fashion & Style
What is the one piece of clothing you cannot live without?
I can’t choose just one. I’d be absolutely lost without my cashmere shawl,
black Manolo Blahniks & my fabulous knit poncho that covers my ###!
You have $50 dollars and 30 minutes to shop. Where do you go and what
do you buy?
I?d have to go with something strapless or a funky, fitted top that would add
a little pizzazz to my favorite black pants and heels. I LOVE the sassy new
styles Betsey Johnson has for Spring!
If you could give one Fashion Public Service Announcement-what would
it be?
Enough with the hip huggers, ladies. They look good on very few people, and
that "cute" baby fat is not cute spilling over the sides of your pants.
Personally, I’m loving the lady-like looks that are popular this season.
A family member gives you a Louis Vuitton Bag-, which turns out to be
a fake. Do you carry it, give it away, or trash it?
One woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure. I’d unload it on eBay and give
it a new home it deserves!
What is your number one fashion secret?
High heels under long pants to give me the illusion of longer legs- we can’t
all be Tyra Banks, but we can use their fashion secrets to our advantage.
Quick Questions (because we are lazy)
Wal-Mart or Target?
Are you kidding? Target, hands down! Where else can I pick up Isaac Mizrahi
and toilet bowl cleaner in one stop?
Kate Spade or Prada?
Kate Spade- it’s the epitome of what’s hot for spring & works around the
clock with any outfit.
Martha or Oprah?
Oprah-let’s face it—- Martha went to the Big House & Oprah strikes a
better balance between femininity and self-empowerment.
New York or London?
New York in a New York Minute! You can’t beat the energy, culture & fabulous
eats.
Barney’s or Bergdorf?
Bergdorf, dahhling!
Founded in 2003, TBF is a fashion blog dedicated to helping you live your best for less. We give you the 411 on the latest fashion trends & tips and sample sales. 