TBF Update: I got an Apple Nano, but…..

… not the Apple Red Nano.Tobias said he was concerned that I wouldn’t get the Nano red in time, so he bought me a Nano in silver and gave it to me early cause I’m training to run a 5k (yes, I actually have to train to run a 5k.. that’s how out of shape I am). It’s a nice Nano, works good, and holds 500 songs (which is more than enough for me), but it isn’t the Apple Red Nano.It’s like a kid asking for a Nintendo Wii and receiving an Atari 2600. I mean it’s a good enough gift, you can play games and all, but it isn’t exactly what you wanted.

I’m not sure what to do, other than to listen to my silver Nano.  I mean, I appreciate the gift, but it isn’t exactly what I wanted and with guys you don’t want to discourage them from taking the initiative in regards to gifts, but…..

I really wanted that red Nano.


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  1. Bethany says

    Be careful. If you let him know that you were disappointed, you may never get a gift again. Boys are so funny about gift buying for women. I kind of expect to not get what I actually asked for anymore. I’ve found that if I just don’t expect anything, I give a much better reaction than when I literally cut out the picture of what I want and hand it to him. Somehow the guy still manages to get the wrong thing.

  2. TBF says

    I know.. I know.. Since he reads the blog.. I’m sure he’s going to have something to say. I don’t want to discourage him from buying things.. but geez.. It was the only thing I wanted for christmas.

    How do you get them to give you want you want without making them feel like your dictating to them what to buy you? Is there a way to do this? Or are we just stuck with our Nano silver.

  3. Cathy says

    Some people might think this is terrible, but I actually go shopping with my husband and pick out what I want for Christmas and then he buys it. Then he wraps it up and gives it to me on Christmas. (I do the same for him – this works especially well for clothes.) It might not work for some people, but we always get what we want! :-)

  4. lori says

    i see nothing wrong with telling him the truth. i never did with my ex-husband, and he kept getting me ugly things i was forced to wear (think hot pink sweater with shocking yellow and green flowers).

    i tell my guy yay or nay. men don’t mind. they rather you be happy. i’ve learned that from experience.

  5. divaliscious11 says

    I say exchange it and get what you want…Some times my H gets it right on the money and sometimes its a little off. He gets a tad bit salty but i always remind him he’d be pissed it I didn’t use it/wear it at all. Then start a wish list… my H has one for me and he knows anything on the list will be a winner but since there are lots of items on the list i don’t know what is coming…if you decide you know longer want something, or you get it yourself, simply remove it from the list.

  6. JR says

    I think it would be totally fine to ask him if he would mind you taking the receipt and exchanging it for the red one.  You wanted what you wanted.  If he’s not overly insecure, he should understand and be fine with it.  I know that my boyfriend always keeps the receipts in case I’m dissatisfied with his gift choices, and while I probably wouldn’t say “Hey, you bought me the Sex in the City giftset and I really wanted a set of speakers, can I exchange it?”, seeing as he put a lot of thought into the gift, I know that a change of color would not bother him.  Hopefully your man wants you to be happy and satisfied above and beyond all, and you aren’t asking him to spend more money on you.  Maybe, it’s superficial, but aren’t gifts inherently superficial?  And seeing as this gift in particular involves donating money to an important cause, I think you should tell him how you feel and be assertive!  You’re not going to stop feeling how you feel, so go ahead and get what you want!  And next time you want a particular gift from him, state specifically what you want and why.  (“I really want the RED Ipod Nano because I would like music to listen to while I run, and, more importantly, a percentage of the proceeds go to AIDs awareness organizations and that’s something that’s really important to me.”)

  7. says

    I don’t want to sound harsh, but aren’t you being a bit picky? Does the colour matter thaaat much? You should thank him for being so thoughtful for buying you one early, instead of whining about the colour…

  8. Rachel says

    When it comes to gifts I just tell hubby to give me the $$$, I buy what I want then tell all my friends what good taste he has. Its a win/win situation!

  9. TBF says

    It’s not just the color, but that a portion of the proceeds go to fight the spread of AIDS in Africa, a cause that I worked with (and continue to be involved with) before all of this Budget Fashionista hoopla. Plus it was to act as a motivation to continue with my 5k training.

    I don’t think there’s anything wrong with getting what you want and wanting a $149 iPod Nano. If I was a real snot, I would have asked for a $300 iPod with video (which I don’t need at all). On the other hand, as I stated before, I’m not going to take the present back cause I appreciate the thought, even though it came in silver.

    So rather than getting on me about wanting a red iPod, lets address the bigger question- which is how do you get them (read: men) to give you what you want as a gift without making them feel like you’re dictating the gift? Is there a way do it? If so, how??

  10. Bethany says

    To some extent, I think this dilemna depends on the guy. Personally, I think ‘Anonymous’ has a great idea for your man in getting you the silver one now to make you think you aren’t getting the red one and then surprising you with the red one on Christmas morning. Wouldn’t it be great if we never had to hint and they just got us great gifts and we could be totally surprised in a good way!? I mentioned this blog to my new guy. I’m still learning about him, so this was a good way to find out how he is about presents. I’m lucky(haha) enough to have both my birthday and Christmas in the same week. SO, I found out he doesn’t like surprises. He would rather know exactly what I’m going to get him. That makes it easier on me, but I still don’t know if he is any good at picking out presents. That brings me to another dilemna, which I would be interested to see what other people think… We’ve been friends for a while, but only seeing each other for about a month. He made the mistake of telling me while we were just friends that he had bought some jewelry for an ex-girlfriend last Valentine’s day. He never gave it to her because he realized the relationship wasn’t going anywhere. I have a feeling that he is planning on giving it to me for either my birthday or Christmas. What is a girl to do??

  11. says

    Ahh, this is a dilemma I’ve pondered myself many a time. I try to always post a wishlist on whatever blog I’m keeping at the time in hopes that my significant other will get the hint next time he happens across it. It’s actually worked in the past! I suppose you could also do something else a little more passive-aggressive, like leave your amazon.com wishlist up on your computer screen when you know there’s a good chance he’ll see it. Finally and most deviously, you could go in cahoots with a mutual friend, who would “just happen to” casually remark to him about how much you love a certain item, and what a great gift it would be. Works even better if you know he hunts for suggestions from your friends!

  12. anonymous says

    First of all, its a shame that your man selected a silver one instead of red. The Red campaign is great and its a shame that he didn’t make that connection.

    Maybe red was sold out at the place he went and he got worried that you would have nothing to open and he got the silver one because he thought it would be better than nothing.

    This year, I found out exactly what I wanted and I sent “Santa” the url. It isn’t romantic, it probably won’t even be a surprise, but he’ll know exactly what I want.
    Maybe next year you can send “Santa” a url wish list of what you want. Santa can select what he wants to give you, so its still a surprise, but its a surprise from a pool of sure fire wins.

    Maybe Tobais is clever and is disappointing you with silver in order to surpise you with red on Christmas day, and he’ll keep the silver one for himself after you have used it to train in time? (Wouldn’t that be nice? It would throw you off the scent!)

    As we all know, with gifts, its the thought that counts, but when you only want one thing—its always nice when the giver can make it so.

  13. Ginger says

    All is not lost. He wanted to make sure your gift arrived on time, and that’s commendable, considering he is of the male species; you wanted some of the purchase price to go to a charity, and that’s also commendable. :)

    How about he orders the red iPod, and whenever it comes it can be your New Year’s / Valentine’s / St Paddy’s Day / April Fool’s / whatever gift. Then, you can be a sweetheart and either let him use the silver one, donate the silver one to a charity (or auction it on eBay and donate the proceeds to an organization fighting AIDS in Africa), or re-gift the silver one to a loved one at another holiday after you’ve bling-blinged it. Or, you could just donate the same amount of money to whatever charity Apple was going to.

    Silver goes with everything. Red clashes with pink and purple. :) I know the red one makes a statement that you support fighting AIDS in Africa, and I’m sure if you tell your man how you feel, he’d be open to talking about it with you.

    Good luck!

  14. lana says

    Budget fashionista, I am disappointed in you!!!
    You seem so down to earth, trying to buy things less expensive, save money etc… then suddenly a litle girl who didnt get what she wanted from santa! OMG, you want red, get out some red nail polish, some red crystals and paint the darn thing red! you know better than that!

    PS,some people out there are not as lucky as you to get big fancy gifts, isnt it time to be thankful?????

  15. Sasha says

    Go exchange it.  He got it right, just not the color :)

    Plus, I don’t think they make the red one in a 2Gig version (on the website they only have 4 & 8 gig versions).  If you have the 2 gig $149 version, you’ll have to trade up.  Maybe you can just donate the $10 instead directly?

    There are also lots of cute ipod skins & ipod tattoos out there.

  16. Reesy says

    I guess I’m a minority. I do not have this problem with my husband. He gives GREAT gifts because he listens AND he knows his wife. I am a party planner/gift basket creator and he knows how out of sorts I can get when people do not pay attention the details. Details…he vowed to never be the one having his head on the chopping block.

    In your case, I’m torn. Your guy did get the gift right! sorta…..did he know of the importance of the color? If it’s the charitable aspect you are concerned with, can’t you just give them a donation directly? Ask your guy to do it as an added incentive to your gift.

    Can you not be motivaed to train for the 5k whether or not your ipod is silver or red?

    Sometimes we expect our men to be mind readers and they are not. Most of them are not detailed oriented….my man just falls all over himself to please me and he will ask if he is unsure, my friends and family will point him in the right direction if he can’t decide what I will love the most.

    Tell your men…there is nothing wrong with asking for help!!!

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